This isn’t a DIY type of blog entry. It's me just sharing my own experience…. I wrote the entry below the day after Michael Jackson died…. It’s sat in my journal and I wasn’t really planning on sharing it…. But everyone’s “Thank You Michael” posts/tweets have motivated me to share my own special “Thank You Michael” story. Because that's how I had ended my journal entry on June 26, 2009.
June 26, 2009 Entry:
I meditate daily for about 30-90 minutes a day, depending on how much time I am able to set aside (the way I see it, meditating is part of my job). Yesterday I had one of the most powerful meditation experiences of my life. I reached the kind of experience that many people spend years and years meditating trying to reach. And it involved Michael Jackson. Seriously.
Shortly after it was confirmed that Michael Jackson had indeed passed away, I decided that I must go on about my daily routine and meditate.
At about 30 minutes into my meditation, I found myself saying, “I am One with my Source” on the inhale and “I am One with my Creator” on the exhale. Over and over again, while feeling my brain kind of fog over, sinking into that beautiful white fog of serenity. I was saying it over and over again for awhile.
I was in a state of deep meditation and I know this because at some point I realized my mantra had unintentionally changed and I was saying “I am One with my people” as one of the phrases. In my meditative state, I remember noticing this change and trying to bring it back to my original mantra. I remember thinking, “No, wait, I’m trying to become One with God, why am I saying something else?” and tried to say “I am One with my Creator.” Instead, “I am One with ALL people” is what I chanted in my head (the only change was that the “my people” came out as “all people” this time around). I remember kinda getting frustrated with my inability to say what I wanted and trying to again switch it back to my original mantra , but I was too deep in meditation. I was at the point you’re kind of slurring your words and don’t have as much control. Then as “I am One with all people” played in my head AGAIN, all of a sudden a huge image of Michael Jackson’s face (circa the “Bad” days with a huge smile on it) made out of LIGHT, flashed in front of me. Suddenly, in a split second, my head had merged into the image in front of me or that image had merged into me (who knows. It happened so fast).
And immediately there was a huge explosion thing that took place inside of me and all of a sudden there were millions of particles of bright lights flashing and raining onto me. And huge amounts of energy rushing up and down my body. It immediately shocked me out of my meditative state, but I didn’t open my eyes. I just laid there with my eyes closed thinking “OMG, What just happened??!! Why are there particles coming into me? What’s going on?” And then I thought, “OMG!! I went into the light!! I WENT INTO THE LIGHT!!! I jumped off the wheel!!” And decided to calm down, take deep breaths, and allow the beautiful energy of love and joy that was falling into my energy field to just flood in. I remember thinking, “Okay. Aura, I’m not sure what’s going on, but please go ahead and absorb all the positive energy that is falling upon me right now.” And I laid there until the particles calmed down, sinking into me, and my energy settled a bit.
When I jumped out of bed, I thought, “I went into the light. I became one with the light! But wait…. Why was it Michael’s face I merged into??”
I decided to keep this experience to myself for at least awhile because it felt kind of special (hey it was my own lil good bye from Michael). So I haven’t yet told any of my spiritual teachers. One of the main goals of meditating is going into the light… And I’d been so close so many times in my past, but I tend to snap out of it/chicken out at last minute. I was glad that I had finally fully experienced the explosion/particles flying thing. Though my experience had been a bit different than what I had read about…
So today I’m at my mom’s house and my grandma is over there as well. I have my laptop out and I put on an old Michael Jackson video (“Don’t Stop til You Get Enough”). Immediately my grandmother starts crying and my mom’s eyes fill with tears and she leaves the room saying she can’t watch because she’s too emotional. My mother and my grandma do not even speak English. I sat there staring at the video, fighting a growing knot in my own throat as I watched my childhood idol.
And then the experience kind of hit me. 3 different generations in one room, 2 of them who do not speak any English and who grew up in Cuba. All felt enormous amounts of love for Michael and all had memories of their lives embedded in his music. I was suddenly amazed by Michael Jackson’s incredible ability to transcend cultures, languages, races, and generations.
Then it REALLY hit me. That was it. Michael transcended. Michael transcended through the human race. Whether through him everyone was able to see the part of themselves that’s free while singing, dancing, and full of joy or the part of themselves that houses that inner-child creativity that aches to burst out of each person.....I don't know but SOMEHOW Michael transcended all the long-standing barriers the human race has built.
Now it makes perfect sense that it was his face I saw as I jumped into the light and became One with not only my source, but with all people. Transcending the internal barriers that my own ego has built
And later on in the afternoon when I received an e-mail containing a tribute to Michael by popular hip hop and R&B artists, and I heard the first rap line, “….You’re Michael Jackson, I’m Michael Jackson, We’re all Michael Jackson,” I couldn’t help but smile. And think that Michael already knew all of this when at Disneyland he used to sing his "message" to me, "Can't you see?? YOU'RE JUST ANOTHER PART OF MEE!!"
Thank you Michael, for facilitating that beautiful experience in a way that my subconscious mind was able to handle.
That's the journal entry. And I also wanted to add a link to a clip of the beautiful tribute Agape (my "church") did for Michael Jackson the Sunday after he passed away. Siedah Garrett, the writer of "The Man in the Mirror" gave a beautiful, moving performance during Service (made all the news):