Friday, August 27, 2010

Insight On Why Negative Situations Occur and On Finding Your Sense of Safety

Sometimes you have to go through things in the physical world, so that you can let go of your fear of death & God.

Insight from my meditation (i.e. My Conversations with God):

"Every negative experience you went through in the physical world was so that you could compare it to the spiritual world & realize that you can find solace & feel even safer in the spiritual world, that you had feared for so much of your life, than at times in the physical. Notice how safe you feel during meditation. See?? You’ve seen this and learned this. Now you are receiving everything you’ve asked for in the physical world. Have it and enjoy it.

But don’t forget where your real sense of safety comes from. From within. From Me. You never felt safe as a child. Adults often caused you even more fear rather than making you feel safe, telling you every possible thing that could go wrong and telling you scary stories. Cops made you feel threatened, doctors scared. So realize your sense of safety has never been dependent on other people. Your sense of safety comes from Me. From knowing that where ever you are, God is. From knowing that I’m inside you, keeping you safe. Anytime you tap into me inside you, and acknowledge your Oneness with me, you are safe. Always. And this is where your sense of safety comes from. I had you experience those negative periods so that you could feel this Truth. When the things around you seemed to fall apart, you were always able to find peace and safety in meditation, in the spiritual world, in Me. You know this now. You are now receiving all the physical things you’ve asked for. All the beautiful things that you’ve wanted in the physical world. And u may now enjoy them on a whole new level because now u know how to feel safe, tap into your sense of safety, and truly enjoy the physical gifts you receive, without fear robbing you of your joy and freedom.

You can now live fully, knowing that you are safe, taken care of, loved, and supported. Live! You are here to serve your Divine Purpose and you are also here to enjoy yourself and this life I have gifted you with. Know that you are loved and safe. I am always with you."

Ah, you cant even imagine how great I felt after that amazing meditation. Old fears just seriously lifted. And throughout the week I was shown it was applicable to EVERYTHING. Anything you are yearning for- safety, support, love, wealth, joy- if u feel are lacking it in the physical world, its often so you can realize your true source.

Later that week I experienced a VERY unusual situation out of nowhere, where I felt I lacked support from someone I care about. As I fought back tears, I immediately heard, "Where does your true support come from, J? Who has always supported you? Has it not been God who has always supported you in everything you've chosen? Who has created opportunities for you out of thin air & made unimaginable miracles happen for you? So why are u seeking your support in the physical world and so bent on receiving it?"

I affirmed that my support comes from God. The tears and sadness immediately lifted and I felt great and so strong and peaceful. I heard, “That strange little event was just to show you you’ve never been dependent on people in the physical world for your support. The miracles you’ve received throughout your life were out of the control of the people who love you in the physical world. God and the Universe have always supported you and made things happen for you. You don’t NEED more support than that.”

And it kept happening with different things. Each time I affirmed where the desired thing really came from, peace filled me, and the situation shifted immediately. :-)

That’s all!

Oh wait, as an aside, I've decided that this major release of fear was also tied to going vegetarian. I believe the fact I'm no longer putting into my body the fight or flight chemicals/toxins/energy that animals release when they're about to be killed, has allowed me to reach deeper levels of peace. This didnt even occur to me until a couple weeks later but I thought it was a cool side effect. :-D

Meditative Insight: Stop Judging Yourself

Another entry from my meditation journal:

People say that if you really want to learn something u should teach it, and I saw the truth of that play out tonight. Yesterday I was teaching people that if they are trying to let go of something, like a habit, addiction, pattern, it helps to drop the guilt, shame, & judgment around it because those things only hurt you and build more energy around the issue, getting you even more stuck.

Then tonight I was doing a quick little 5 minute visualization on happy memories, and randomly this scene from over a year ago w/a guy I don’t know that well, but had liked, popped into my head. I wondered what the heck he was doing in my meditation and did a little “I now turn from my intellect to my intuition to tune into the energy here and receive intuitive wisdom,” to see what was going on. Immediately fear jumped at me (big contrast to the huge happiness vibration I had going). Fear that I wasn’t good enough for him (WHAT???!!!). Because I view him as very fearless and courageous, which I saw as a big contrast to myself, and was scared for him to get to know me because then he would see what a scaredy cat I am and wouldn't like me, on top of pointing it out to me. His fearlessness would totally expose my cowardice. The minute he’d take me camping and see me freak out over a snake, bear, or big spider, he’d know I couldn’t hang. Now, I know way better than to think some man would look at me and decide that I just lack way too much courage for him and so I’m not good enough for him (particularly if I’m in a meditative state- I'm quite wise then). So immediately I thought, that’s not what he thinks about me- I’m projecting. That’s what I think about me!! OMG, I think I suck because of fears I haven’t been able to let go of yet. Oh wow. I’m obviously subconsciously ashamed of myself. I’m holding shame in regards to fear. Okay. Let’s release. “I now release any judgment against myself tied to any fears I hold. I’m human and I forgive myself.” And immense energy started clearing. “With the help of God, I now release ANY conscious or subconscious feelings of shame, guilt, self-hate, anger and/or resentment towards myself for being scared of certain things.” And my body went CRAZY. Waves of energy moved through me and out of me (always awesome). Particularly resentment towards self from my spleen.

“Just like you have no business judging others, you have no business judging yourself. There needs to be no judgment about u holding a fear. It just IS, until you are ready to release it. End of story. That's all there is to it. You’re human and it’s okay for you to have fears as long as you’re growing. Remember 6 months ago when that really advanced healer told you that she was also so scared of seeing, that she refuses to sleep by herself? That was a message to let you know that it’s OKAY. If an older healer, that's more mature than you, and has been doing this for way longer, still holds such fears, then obviously it’s okay for you to feel them too, and is nothing to feel ashamed or bad about. That guy did NOT care. Trust me, that was the last thing on his mind. Do you know how many amazing qualities you possess that would have completely overshadowed your random human fears? Love and accept every aspect of yourself, including your human weaknesses. They’re beautiful and allow you to grow. And any person who does judge you for them isn’t good enough for YOU due to their lack of essential qualities, like compassion and understanding."

Release, release, release. Bliss.

Wow I feel so much lighter. Had no idea I was holding that stuff. I mean I know I hold certain fears when they get triggered and I feel the stress, but didn’t realize the secondary feelings being held about those fears.

LOL, and there’s some awesome guy out there who has no idea that I didn’t want to get to know him better solely because I had subconsciously decided he’d want nothing to do with me because I’m afraid of roaches and heights. Funny how much goes on behind a simple interaction.

*End of Entry*

But I wanted to add a quote from an e-mail I randomly received from my mentor a few weeks later, "What if you absolutely honor the Light that you are now? What would happen if instead of reaching or shunning your Light you accepted where you are right now?"

One of the Quickest, Easiest Ways to Boost Faith

Go outside.


I mean the more "naturey" the better, but really a quick walk in the park (preferably at sunset or sunrise) is usually enough.

I personally feel that the quickest way to obtain a faith-boost is to spend time in nature. I find it impossible to doubt the existence of God when I'm in the presence of nature. When I start focusing on the precision and beauty of every tree, every leaf, every blade of grass, the beauty of the sky, the clouds, the majestic trees, the singing birds, the sun who can touch my skin from a ridiculous amount of miles away, the air that fills my lungs, how it all comes together, I can't even fathom questioning whether there is a God. How could it have all come together so perfectly? I'm usually overwhelmed with gratitude for all of it and all the beauty. It's also a great reminder of how abundant the Universe is.... I'd love to conduct a study on how many people who spend lots of time in nature are atheist. I have a feeling the #s would be low.

So if you feel your faith dwindling or doubt creeping in, go take a walk outside.

And to go with that, I'd love to share a beautiful clip of Agape's choir capturing this message by singing "The Color Purple." BTW, Agape's choir is amazing if you didnt know. I absolutely LOVED this performance and saw a few people moved to tears:

On Finding Love Within a Time Frame.........

Hello! Whew, I've been MIA for a minute! My apologies. The last few months have brought a lot of shifts for me and my focus has been more on my own process,and therefore my writing has been more personal and not as "bloggable." Not because of me, being that I'm a strong proponent that experiences are meant to be shared if someone may benefit or learn from them, but I'm much more careful if they also involve other people. My rule of thumb is that if there is a chance it might hurt someone's feelings, then it should stay in my personal journal. :-) So my focus has been more on private journaling rather than blogging. Anyhow, I wanted to sit down today and transfer over some notes from the last few months and maybe write a couple of new entries. I'm going to try to make up for the last few months so if you're subscribed, you might get a few updates all at one time. :-D

I wanted to start by transferring over this advice I "channeled" while talking to a friend on the phone because a lot of clients and other friends have found it useful. So I thought it was worth sharing.

A friend, who had just broken up with a short-lived boyfriend, was panicking about about getting older and not having found a husband yet. I asked her, "Wait, do you HONESTLY want to get married already?" (which I KNEW she didn't because I know her well and know that if she won 20 million dollars in the lotto tomorrow, and had the freedom to do ANYTHING she wanted, the last thing she would want would be a boyfriend. BTW, I think that's a great way to measure whether you really want a bf/gf). She immediately replied, "No!!! I want to get married in like 3 years. But that means I now only have 3 years to find him and at this rate, I'm freaking out about how that's not going to happen because it's SO hard to find someone!"

The response that immediately flowed from my mouth:
“Stop. Finding love is NOT hard. Finding someone to fall in love with is really NOT difficult. That would make no sense when love is all that really exists. Love is everywhere. Its your natural state of bein...g. Finding true love is fully dependent on how loving you choose to be. You know love comes from inside you and you get what you give. If you choose to be loving towards others, then finding romantic love is the most natural thing. After all, God is in every human being. Every human being is lovable and deserves love. So there is absolutely NO reason that finding romantic love should be difficult, aside from YOU choosing to not be loving and to not see God in others. In this world that was made OUT of love, FROM love (God is love and by definition He’s the Primal Source of everything, so the world, and you, had to be made from His essence/substance), where everyone is One and made from the same thing, and where the God that you so love much is in EVERYBODY, as long as you allow yourself to BE loving and allow yourself to see God in other humans, then finding love should be the easiest process in the world. So don’t worry, when you’re ready and you get there, you’ll find love IMMEDIATELY. This is really a non-issue. Next."

I loved it and wrote it down immediately. :-D